April 30, 2014 -- Updated 1617 GMT (0017 HKT)
Four Duke students created the "You Don't Say?" campaign to point out everyday language that marginalizes gender minorities. FULL STORY
Duke students: Words aren't harmless
April 30, 2014 -- Updated 1247 GMT (2047 HKT)
STORY HIGHLIGHTS
- Duke students created a campaign to point out language that marginalizes others
- The "You Don't Say?" campaign has taken off online
- Instead of dehumanizing others, students say, use language to build each other up
The result of that conversation -- the "You Don't Say?"
campaign, a photo project that points out language that marginalizes
sexual and gender minorities -- has been sweeping across the Web and the
Durham, North Carolina, campus.
The project was
co-founded by Duke sophomores Daniel Kort, Anuj Chhabra, Christie
Lawrence, and Jay Sullivan. Kort is the president of the undergraduate
LGBTQ group Blue Devils United, and Chhabra is the president of Think Before You Talk,
a group aimed at bringing awareness to the implications of offensive
language. Lawrence and Sullivan serve on Think Before You Talk's
executive board.
The students explained
via e-mail why they got involved, and what they hope the photo campaign
will accomplish. Their responses have been edited for clarity.
Anuj Chhabra on using the phrase 'That's so gay':
I thought it was
important to bring awareness to the implications that these words have
because having used some of [these phrases] in high school, I quickly
realized how differently other Duke students perceived me [when I
commented], "That's so gay."
Micheal Weakley on LGBTQ teens
Photos: 'Culture, not a costume' posters
One of my friends in particular would constantly question me: "What do you mean by 'That's so gay?'"
I realized that using the
word "gay" to describe a teacher who I didn't like or an unfavorable
event really didn't make sense, and I began to change the habit.
Our intention was to use
personal testaments to let people personally challenge themselves, as
opposed to "banning" these words. Our desire to use the personal "I"
stems from the fact that most people, after thinking about why it is so
common in today's society to equate something like "dumb" or
"unfavorable" with "gay," are quick to change their habits.
It is not necessarily homophobic or sexist people using such words and phrases, but largely just ordinary people.
Daniel Kort on why he participated:
Throughout elementary
and middle school, I was consistently bullied by my classmates because
of characteristics that others deemed "gay."
I was constantly called "fag" and "bitch."
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At times, it felt as if my entire class was against me, and I can recall only one instance that somebody stood up for me.
I would cry to my mom during the car ride home, and my schoolwork and motivation suffered.
With help from the school counselor, I was eventually able to stand up for myself and disregard my bullies.
In my first year [at
Duke], I was called a "fag" by one of my hall mates in the first month
of school. I was lucky to have my friends there to intervene, but I know
that not all students are as fortunate.
I was motivated by the
bystanders who were there for me that night, and this experience
propelled my enthusiasm to work on the campaign.
Though I don't have the
same reaction nowadays in response to these words, I stand in solidarity
with younger students who are marginalized by their classmates.
Christie Lawrence on how these terms impact her and others:
All of these phrases
impact me, whether they directly address me or not. I think it is
important to try to be as good of a person as you can, and through
conversations with my friends, I have grown to recognize the hurt these
words can inflict.
Even if I am not gay, I
know that calling someone a "fag" or qualifying an expression of
admiration with "no homo" attaches hurtful connotations to words that
are directly connected to a certain identity.
Telling me to "man up"
or not be a "pussy" tells me that you believe women are weaker, more
emotional and lesser than a man. It tells me that you think a certain
way to act is the right way and anything that does not fall under the
umbrella of "acceptable" behavior or emotions is something to be put
down. This attitude, that there is a correct way to have courage, be
successful, or achieve happiness, is something that I believe hurts
everyone in our society, including myself.
This campaign is not an
attempt to ban words or invalidate someone's right to free speech, but
instead is an attempt to show how these words are hurtful for many. One
comment on an article I read about our campaign explained it very
nicely: You have the right to say these offensive phrases, but we also
have the right to tell you why we think these phrases are hurtful.
Jay Sullivan on how language reflects values:
I am a Christian. That
is the lens I bring to all the work that I do in the community here at
Duke, in the local Durham community, and in my daily life.
When I was in high
school, I was the leader of the my school's small Christian Fellowship. I
went to a private co-ed prep school in New Haven, Connecticut, called
Hopkins School, and I distinctly remember during my junior year during the day of silence
I was wearing an ally sticker in support of my friends who were silent.
In class that day, an older friend came up to me and said, '"Look, Jay,
I respect you but you need to take that ally sticker off man. You're
condoning their sinful actions. You can't support them and be the leader
of a Christian organization."
I was quite taken aback,
and after a short dialogue I took off the sticker to avoid any further
conflict. That experience bothered me for a while, that I didn't take a
stand to tell him, "People are people and they deserve the same rights
and freedom to live the way they want that you have, as well. God loves
everyone regardless of any part of their identity that you may have
deemed sinful or unworthy."
This campaign is not about language; it is about what this language represents.
The way we talk is a
reflection of our beliefs and perceptions of the world and it is vital,
at least for me, to examine whether what I say is in line with my values
and how I view the world.
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