Leah Green It's only by turning the tables on sexual aggression that we can see how shocking it is



  • Only by turning the tables on sexual aggression can we see how bad it is

    The disbelief of the men in my film mirrors the disbelief we should all feel when acts of everyday sexism happen to women

    Link to video: 'Get your arse out, mate': we turn the tables on everyday sexism A few weeks ago I was out with my housemate in Brixton, in south London, when I saw a chair I liked outside an antique shop. The fabric reminded me of something my granny had in her old house. "What a lovely chair," I said to the shop's proprietor. "Thanks," he replied, "have you two ever made out with each other?" As we hastily tried to leave, he continued: "Perhaps tonight you'll start scissoring each other? Oh, come on, I'm only joking!"
    As is usual when men make inappropriate sexual remarks to me, I felt embarrassed. This time, at least, there was a slight silver lining, as it was a perfect scenario to recreate for my film, in which I tested out real sexist situations on men. I took tweets from @EverdaySexism, where women (and men) recount sexist incidents and, using hidden cameras, acted these out on unsuspecting members of the public. Since launching the film on the Guardian website on Friday it has garnered over a million hits and nearly three thousand comments.
    Responses to the film have been varied. Women have said that the film, which uses comedy to make a serious point, highlights perfectly the kind of harassment they receive on a daily basis. Many men have said that the words coming from the mouth of a woman made them realise their weight and impact. However, others felt the film was cruel, and that subjecting innocent men to sexually aggressive comments made me no better than the men who do that, thus completely undermining the feminist message. Those are the criticisms I would like to answer.
    Countless people have said: "So, you know these men are sexist, do you?" Or: "What have these poor men done to deserve this?" In short: no, and nothing. Nor am I saying that I believe the majority of men behave like this towards women. Most men I know wouldn't dream of cat-calling a woman, or asking a stranger about her pubic grooming habits. But I know that sexism is a problem, that the majority of women have been victims of it. Much like the men in the video, they haven't done a single thing to deserve it.
    To see the film as a revenge plot is to miss the point. Its comedic nature made some people think that I was taking the piss out of the men who appear in it, but by acting out real cases of everyday sexism, as a woman, I was pointing out the outrageousness of it. I feel it does much to highlight how intimidating and impolite (not to mention bizarre) sexual harassment can feel to its victims.
    Answering the second area of criticism will help to illustrate this. "None of these men are even offended, they just think she's crazy! So, that disproves the point" was the gist of many a comment. I won't bother to address the responses implying that, because the men in the video didn't run away screaming, women shouldn't make a fuss about sexual harassment.
    Sexism is a big deal, and telling women they should put up and shut up does nothing to solve the issue. Furthermore, such an argument necessarily interprets the film as a straight "get your own back" tale, when it is exactly the difference between the way the men in the film reacted and the way women react in real life that puts the issue so beautifully into focus. I am well aware that I come across as, at best, a complete fruitloop in this video: the men targeted were mostly completely confused by my sexual advances, and all but one refused my offers.
    I hear stories of women being inappropriately spoken to like this all the time; I personally experience it often. Never, ever, have I heard of a woman being surprised when, for example, she is honked at by a male driver. Scared, perhaps; embarrassed, almost definitely. Women have grown to expect sexual aggression and thus it becomes normalised. By turning the tables we can look at harassment with fresh eyes. The men's disbelief mirrors the disbelief we all should still feel when such acts of everyday sexism happen to women; their surprise reminds us this should not be taken as a compliment, or brushed off, or tolerated.
    The experiment also proves that while, yes, women are sometimes sexually aggressive to men and, yes, men are sometimes objectified by women, it is simply false to say the issue is the same for both genders. When I asked men what sexual harassment they had encountered, the few that had something to offer spoke of: "One time, with one woman, 10 years ago." My father, who is a rather handsome chap, only cited a drunk woman on the bus asking him to go home with her around 30 years ago. Women will often be able to give you an example from that week, that day even. If it were an equally pressing issue for men and women, why were the men I approached so taken aback?
    The things some men say to women are shocking. It is a sad truth that only by turning the tables do we hear how unbelievable they really are.
    COPY http://www.theguardian.com
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